I’ve been on a fairy tale kick lately, on netflix that is. There are several great made-for-t.v. miniseries that put a modern spin on some fairy tale classics. If you haven’t seen them yet, you should check out Tin Man, Alice, and Neverland. No doubt as a result of this input, I came up with this beginning for a short story. Enjoy!
“Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?” A whisper barely loud enough to reach its target escaped from the heart-shaped lips of a porcelain-skinned girl.
Moist brown eyes stared at the reflection, seeing only flaws.
“Isabella? Isabella!” Her stepmother’s voice carried up the stairs, forcing Isabella to blink away the encroaching tears.
“Yes, I’m here,” she replied as she rose from the cold wood floor.
“Time to come down now. Your father’s home.”
“Coming,” she said with a sigh.
Small hands smoothed the front of a spotless blue dress. Delicate slippered feet padded down the steps and stopped when they touched the first row of white tiles.
Isabella watched her father hang up his coat, slide off his polished leather shoes, and pull his phone out of the front pocket of his briefcase.
He walked past her without glancing up from the screen.
Isabella bit her lip and followed him into the dining room.
She watched him ease into his chair as he pressed a few more keys, then set the phone within easy reach, just to the right of his fork.
“How was school today Isabella?” he asked without making eye contact.
Before she could answer, the kitchen doors swung open and her stepmother entered the room carrying a tray laden with food.
Her father smiled.
Her stepmother smiled back as she set the tray on the table, then leaned over to give her father a lingering kiss.
When it ended, her stepmother sat, and finally noticed Isabella.
“Isabella, come sit down.”
That was the last thing anyone said to her.
Isabella picked at her food as her father and stepmother talked and laughed.
After an obligatory fifteen minutes, she excused herself and returned to her room.
She stared again into her wall-length mirror and this time when she spoke, she swore she could hear a voice laughing behind the reflective surface as it whispered,
Not you Isabella, definitely not you.
Great starting point! Potentially evil stepmother, check; incidiously evil force (small screens), check; insecure girl, Heaven knows what she’ll do for affirmation, check—-> Lots of possibilities here, Nicole! Fairy Tales are great fodder.
Hope you’re having a great holiday weekend, my friend!
Thanks Vaughn! I am having a great holiday! Four days off work, lots of delicious food, time with my family, and time to write. It doesn’t get much better! I hope you are having a great holiday as well.
Great start! I like how you set everything up so quickly but neatly. Looking forward to finding out where you take this! =)
Thanks Sarah! I think it will be fun, for me at least. :) I appreciate you reading.
Aw, my favorite genre! And this is off to an engaging start. Isabella’s gentle and dutiful nature earns her a foothold in my heart while her parent’s neglect has my mother radar screaming in protest. I can’t wait to read more! :D
I’m glad you enjoyed the opening D.D., and thanks for commenting. I have a few ideas running through my head. I think I better get some of them down before another week starts! I hope you’re having a great Thanksgiving break.
This is great. A few years back I bought season 1 of the Rocky and Bullwinkle show. My daughter and I have been watching it this week mainly for the “Fractured Fairy Tales” segments in each episode. When I read the start of your story I almost fell off of my chair ! Your episode I am guessing will be a little more serious ? Can’t wait to see, (but of course will HAVE TO !)
I really like how only Isabella has a name. Good writing !
Thanks Scott! I’ll try to entertain, but I’m quite certain I cannot compete with Rocky and Bullwinkle. :) I hope you’re having a great time with your daughter!
Oooh, that was a good little read! I love your style of weaving in details.
Just coming across your blog, by the way. Nice to meet you. :)
Susan @ The Feather and the Rose
Thanks so much Susan! I appreciate you stopping by and taking the time to comment. I followed the link to your blog and it’s lovely! Best of luck to you as you begin querying for your YA novel!
Nicole, thank you for following me on Twitter; I’m following you now that I have read some of your amazing writing. I have to catch up on your ongoing story here, it’s intriguing!
Thank you Lynn for stopping by as well as taking the time to read and comment on the story. I loved your posts with Sue Harrison and I look forward to getting to know you as well! I hope you have a great evening!